Hi. I’m back after a several weeks hiatus during which my family and I completed our move to Tampa. (Moving itself is such a pain it’s amazing how often I forget that in time to make the next move). Now that we’ve placed most of our stuff where it is supposed to go, and have had time to settle in and get situated to the area, I have found myself stepping back to contemplate just how significant a change this is in my life and that of my family. And I’ve realized that our decision to move to Tampa means quite a lot. My wife and I took a pretty big risk to come down here. We left behind a very full life in New York, as well as many close friends and family to venture into a basically unknown setting. But I now understand that our decision is the theme of loveafterlaw.com in microcosm, because in making this major life change, we are sowing the seeds of love, and cultivating a rich and meaningful life of love for ourselves, each other and our kids out of the conclusion of my legal career—love after law.
Love For Ourselves
T and I obviously had personal interests in moving here. She wants to be a social worker and work with veterans. Down here, the low cost of living allows us to move forward on one salary while she completes here studies. And when she has her degree, she is in one of the best places in the country for jobs working with veterans. For myself, I’m pursuing a life-long dream of having my own business, and the Tampa Bay Area, with its low taxes and low cost of living allows me to earn U.S. dollars and spend them in the Tampa economy. I can get my feet under me faster than I ever could in New York. We both did this because it was the right move for ourselves, and as an act of self-love. And in so doing, we have positioned ourselves to be better spouses to each other, better parents to our children, and better people all around.
Love For Each Other
I wanted to make this move for T, and T wanted to make it for me. I support here professional aspirations, and she supports mine. We both want each other to be successful because we know that our personal success will be best for each other and for our family. My wife wanted me to be in an environment that would be easier on my depression, and understood that Tampa, with its year round warmer and sunnier weather and easier living would help me fend it off better. I also wanted her to be in a warmer climate because that’s what she grew up in and that’s what she’s been longing for since we first moved up north. The winters were beginning to grate on both of us.
Love For Our Children
Only time will tell if our two boys with thrive here, but T and I think they have a pretty good shot. One of the things we wanted to free them from was the New York high school Olympics. New York City kids have to apply to public high school the way the rest of the country applies to college. We didn’t want to put our kids through that. We wanted them to simply be able to automatically from grade school through high school in a good school district. That’s one of the reasons we chose our location.
But more than school, we feel like we are already giving our kids a better life. Here, they can go outside and play all year round. They are not locked down like they were in New York, where they needed a parent to go anywhere. Here, they can go out and ride their scooters and play ball with other neighborhood kids on their own. They get to be much more independent. And we bought them bikes. Once we get the training wheels up, they should have a fresh feeling of freedom like they’ve never before experienced. I’m looking forward to them being able to camp out in the Boy Scouts, play sports, be comfortable outside, and just be able to enjoy not having to worry about looking after coats, hats and gloves.
Love For Our Family
T and I set out on this journey, ultimately, in order to build a home filled with love and happiness for all of us individually, and our family as a whole. We hope that, once and for all, we have put ourselves in a place where we as a family can rise to our fullest potential, by letting each of us run as far and as fast as we can. We know that we are taking risks. We are ripping up our old garden and starting from scratch, with new soil and new seeds. But we’re confident. We understand that our old garden was struggling to grow in the unsustainable ecosystem of my legal career, and we know that we had to start again. We are confident that this new post-law garden that we are now seeding will grow into a thriving little patch that will enrich ourselves, each other, our kids and our family for the rest of our lives.
Sowing Your Seeds
Maybe you’re like us. Maybe you’re struggling to thrive in a career or lifestyle that no longer suits you. Maybe you need a fresh start on new land in a new climate. Maybe you need to change something or everything in order to be happy again. My advice is to ask yourself “can I truly reach my fullest potential in my current situation?” If the answer is no, then take the plunge, make the move. Sow new seeds.
I’m not saying be foolhardy and just pick up and move anywhere. T and I put a lot of thought and planning into the decision to move to Florida, to Tampa and especially to this neighborhood. But once we felt we knew as much as any reasonable person could be able to know, we made the move. We did it despite considerable unknowns. And we know we could fail, but we’d rather reach for greatness than settle for less than the best life has to offer.
So what do you think? Are you thriving in your current environment? Can you truly reach your fullest potential in the place you are now? What changes are you considering making? Let me know in the comments. And also feel free to ask me any questions you may have.